I Corinthians 13:4 begins with “Love is patient, love is kind…”, and 1 John 4:16 tells us, “God is love.”
Therefore, God is kind.
While God’s kindness is intended to lead us to repentance, (Romans 2:4) our kindness should lead others to God. When we withhold kindness, we withhold the opportunity for others to receive a glimpse of God through us. It is such an important part of the fruit of the Spirit.
Let’s learn a little more about kindness.
It is revealed through our words and actions.
Kindness is more than just being nice. Being nice is pleasant and shows good manners, but it is not necessarily genuine or spirit-led.
1 John 3:18 tells us, “Dear children, let us not love with word or speech, but with actions and in truth.” This doesn’t mean kind words are useless, but that we are to back up our kind words with kind actions.
Kindness is intentional and sometimes even sacrificial.
Who is one of the kindest people you know? What makes you believe they are kind?
It compels us to help when we see a need.
One of my favorite Instagram accounts is @sharonsaysso. Sharon McMahon is fondly known to her followers as “America’s Government Teacher.” One of the things I love most about her account and her “governerds” (followers) is when she picks a need and rallies the governerds to help. Most recently, her 843K followers have donated over $760,000 for two organizations helping Ukrainian refugees. Some give $1 and some give more. She has also rallied her followers to donate blood, pay off medical debt for strangers, and give to teachers in the past.
Kindness is about helping others. 1 John 3:17 ESV says, “But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?” We are not meant to give to every cause or fill every need, but when we see a need and it really bothers us or touches our heart, that is likely the Holy Spirit moving in us to jump into action.
Matthew West’s song, “Do Something” speaks perfectly about this notion.
I woke up this morning, Saw a world full of trouble now, thought, How'd we ever get so far down, and, How's it ever gonna turn around? So I turned my eyes to Heaven I thought, "God, why don't you do something?" Well, I just couldn't bear the thought of People living in poverty, Children sold into slavery, The thought disgusted me. So I shook my fist at Heaven, Said, "God, why don't you do something?" He said, "I did, yeah, I created you."
We are God’s hands and feet. We can’t assume someone else will come along to help.
It is minimized in sneaky ways by the enemy.
I think most people inherently want to be kind. Max Lucado said in a sermon, “It is an attribute of God, and it’s an attribute of God’s people.” God made us in his image, so we all have kindness within. By his Spirit, we produce the fruit.
If kindness is how others glimpse the goodness of God through us, our enemy will stop at nothing to prevent it. Here are some examples of his trickery:
- He distracts us with our phones so we don’t see the person crying beside us.
- He stirs up fear when we see a homeless person.
- He whispers that our little bit of help won’t make a difference.
- He makes isolation feel comfortable and living in community feel uncommon and awkward so that we won’t get to know our neighbors and have no idea when one of them is in need.
- He increases our envy so we want to buy the latest gadget and the nicest car, rather than donate money to those in need.
- He puffs up our pride so that when someone hurts our feelings, we write them off instead of working through an issue and forgiving them.
- He lies that we need to do more and be more productive to be valuable, so that we no longer have time to stop and help someone.
Sometimes it is difficult to recognize when the enemy is at work, but we must be on guard and walk in step with the Spirit. The Spirit is moving in us, but it’s up to us to hear him and obey.
It is increased when we remember that God created every person.
God created all of us in his image. Every person. When we remind ourselves that God loves “that” person, we are more likely to treat them with kindness and compassion. The person who wronged us. The person who lost everything in a fire started by her own cigarette. The person who is homeless under the bridge. The person who was charged with a crime. Even the person in the mirror.
Jesus tells us, “For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me….Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” (Matthew 25: 35-36, 40)
When we show kindness to others, we are directly repaying God for the abundant kindness that he shows us. When we are kind to ourselves and others, we are honoring God’s creation.
It is selfless.
Although there are intrinsic rewards of kindness, a truly kind act is not about us or our pride. It is selfless behavior: concerned more with the needs and wishes of others than one’s own.
We are not kind in order to earn a thank you, accolades or rewards. We are kind because God requires it of us. The prophet Micah said, “He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” (Micah 6:8 ESV)
When kindness becomes about ourselves, we have the wrong motivations. When that person doesn’t say thank you, in kindness we forgive them. When someone else is promoted to a position you wanted, in kindness we organize the party and clap for them.
We are to be kind for their good, not for ours.
Our pride can be dangerous and is even considered detestable by God. Proverbs 16:18 tells us, “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.”
Paul instructs us, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others.” (Phillippians 2:3-4)
It has no qualifiers.
God doesn’t want us to be kind only to those who “deserve it,” but to everyone. Thank goodness God isn’t kind only to the deserving, or where would we be? He is willing to shower his mercy on everyone. Titus 3:4 says, “But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy.”
We did nothing to earn God’s kindness, and others don’t need to earn our kindness. All too often, I find myself reflecting the behavior of the other person. If someone is rude to me, it makes me want to be rude to them. This is a normal human reaction, but it’s one that is prideful and selfish, not kind.
In Ephesians 4:32, Paul says, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
It’s not our place to judge or decide if someone is worthy of our kindness. It’s our place to obey.
As children of God filled with the Holy Spirit, we are called to be kind to everyone. And we are capable of being kind more often than we are. Let’s practice more kindness, paying attention to where the Spirit moves us and not allowing our pride or the enemy to stand in our way. In doing so, we will reflect light into the darkness, bringing hope to others who may be in dire need of God. What an honor to be his hands and feet.
Ideas to practice kindness:
- Take a meal to a family in need.
- Volunteer at a nonprofit event.
- Encourage someone who looks like they are a bit down.
- Ask your church staff if there is a family in need and help them (anonymously, if possible).
- Acknowledge and thank those who work in the background of your daily life (mail carrier, server, janitor, teacher, etc.).
- Donate for an emergency need.
- Attend the funeral for a family member of a friend, even if you didn’t know the family member, just to support your friend. (I cannot tell you how much this kindness has meant to me over the years when my family members have passed away.)
- Eliminate your negative self-talk and replace it with kind words.
- Do something thoughtful for a co-worker (bring their favorite bagel, share a puzzle, make a crockpot meal on their busy day, etc.).
- Offer a single parent to shuttle their kids with yours.
- Contact a hospital and organize donations for a need (stuffed animals for a children’s ward, sewn heart pillows for a cardiologist unit, blankets for a chemo treatment facility, etc.).
- Volunteer to play games at a foster care home or assisted living facility.
Lord, we thank you for the unmerited kindness you have shown us throughout our lives. Please help us to show similar kindness toward others, pointing them to you. Remind us to be kind to ourselves. Let our pride and selfishness not keep us from obeying your commands and prompts. Open our eyes to see the needs before us and help us do something to help them. Amen.
Practicing the Fruit of the Spirit: An Invitation
Practicing the Fruit of the Spirit: Love
Practicing the Fruit of the Spirit: Joy
Practicing the Fruit of the Spirit: Peace
Practicing the Fruit of the Spirit: Patience
Practicing the Fruit of the Spirit: Goodness
