Throughout my life, I have been driven to achieve. Get the top grades. Graduate college as fast as I can. Land an awesome job with great people. I was proud that I could achieve these accomplishments by my own merits.
Meanwhile, my faith stayed lukewarm for much of my life. I would attend church most Sundays and even go to Christian conferences occasionally. I believed in God and thought that was enough, until a few years ago.
This week, I listened to the audiobook version of Beth Moore’s book, Chasing Vines: Finding Your Way to an Immensely Fruitful Life. As I was listening, she made a statement that made me pause. It was this:
“The natural result of increased self-sufficiency is decreased God-dependency.”
Beth Moore, Chasing Vines
This struck a chord with me because it was true for so much of my life. I did not depend on God in my everyday life because I felt like I was doing pretty well on my own.
The Excuses That Bound Me
For years, God had been trying to get my attention.
He asked me to read His word. “I’m too busy, God.”
He asked me to commit to a Bible study. “I have to work that day, God.”
He asked me to pray more. “I’m so tired when I go to bed.”
He asked me to listen to him. “I’ve got this, God.”
Again and again, I turned away, proud of how I was achieving success in my career. Even as I stumbled through poor personal choices, I thought I had things under control, until God showed me otherwise.
Proverbs 28:14 says, “Blessed is the one who always trembles before God, but whoever hardens their heart falls into trouble.”
I was not trembling.
Shifting Dependence from Myself to God
Several years ago, God decided to capture my attention by leading me away from my self-suffiency. As my excuses and idols fell away, I began to feel more desire than ever to know him, to read his word and obey him. So I did; this was when I began reading my Bible on a consistent basis.
I have known of God since I was a child, but my faith has grown more in the past few years than it did in those preceding decades, once I finally put God first in my life. A deeper connection with my Lord was formed when I learned to abide in him and trust him with my life.
I have found that my earthly achievements and accolades don’t hold a candle to living out his purpose for my life.
And I am so grateful.
I wish I would have discovered years ago the peace and joy that came only from freeing myself of the chains of self-sufficiency and leaning into the everlasting faithfulness of God. As I finally pursued him and trusted his plan for my life, I knew that I must not ever let contentment in my achievements, roles or comforts distract me from him again.
Encouragement For All of Us
“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. “
John 15:5
Our self-sufficiency is a fallacy that is used to distract us from true connection with him. Even good things can prevent us from abiding in Christ if we’re not careful to prioritize him above all else. I encourage you–if God is trying to get your attention, listen.
Our self-sufficiency is a fallacy that is used to distract us from true connection with him.
Let us abide more securely in Christ as we grow to depend on him, so that the fruit of the Spirit will grow in us to glorify God. There is a more meaningful life available to us when we trust him and his purpose for our life.
Lord, we thank you the opportunity to connect with you in such a profound way. Will you please reduce our self-sufficiency and increase our God-dependency? Help us draw near to you and put you first in our lives, Lord. You are our good Father and we desire for our lives to reflect your faithfulness and light. May it be so. Amen.
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